How To Maintain Your Mental Health As A Mom

Finding ways to maintain my mental health has improved my general wellness & moods drastically. As a mom, I don’t get much time for myself outside of taking care of everyone else so I understand how impossible it may feel when you imagine adding MORE into your already tight schedule, especially when it’s something for yourself. I guarantee you, the things I mention in this post do not require more than a few minutes of your time & most of which, you can do at home.

The goal is to not only improve your mental health but to also prioritize maintaining your mental health. One little activity that you’ve dedicated 5 minutes to intentionally be present for, every day, makes all the difference.

A mothers mental health is not often talked about. We have the most important job in the world, yet are usually left under-cared for. We lose track of days, critique ourselves before anyone else gets the chance, stay up hours after our kids went to bed, going over everything that happened that day & what we’d do differently.

We’re wired this way, it’s the instinct of a mother. But it drains us. The comfort & chaos of our daily routines drain us & leaves us running on E and caffeine. We support each other through motherhood but we should also prioritize supporting ourselves. It’s tricky to talk about and even trickier to actually do, but I was told something before that completely flipped my mindset & I want to share that with you.

We start our days at 100%. We intend to give 100% to our kids, our spouses, our jobs & our households, with 0% left for ourselves. Instead, stop trying to give 100% to all things at once. I have to clean my house, cook dinner, and play with my kids today. 50% of my day will go towards playing with the kids BUT, during that 50% of dedicated time, I will give 100% of my time & focus solely to playtime. And so on.

Organize your days so you don’t have to carry the full weight of the mental load. Offload. The things I list below are just a few ways that I like to take care of my mental health. Some of which give me an outlet to brain dump & work through my emotions.

1. Physically moving your body, intentionally.

When I’m in the middle of a bad anger fit, I immediately jump on my bed. The hardest part is getting myself over to the bed when I’m in that blind rage. Once I start jumping, I can feel the anger leaving the more I forcefully exhaust my body. I’m home with my kids so I can’t just get up & leave the house to go on a run. This is more ideal to my life.

After getting through the initial fit is when you start to maintain your mental health. Just because you don’t feel angry anymore does not mean it went away. Your feelings are like building blocks. Each time you feel stress or anger, it continues to build and build.

When I get easily frustrated, overwhelmed or triggered, I’ve noticed it’s because I let my stress build up instead of maintaining it with daily activity. I make it a priority to fit a few minutes into my daily schedule to run, jump, or stretch. Having a place to push out frustrations instead of keeping them in my body has helped me feel better mentally, emotionally, and physically.

2. Writing to maintain your mental health.

Writing has always been a consistent hobby of mine so journaling grounds me in a comfortable way. Lately journaling has been more of a “word vomit” for me but I always feel clearer and more relaxed afterwards.

I use my journal like a diary/ notepad. When I feel like I have a million thoughts in my head and I can’t focus, I just write. My journal actually never makes sense, I just start with whatever thought is at the front and write until I have nothing else to write.

3. Make a list.

I use lists and planners for EVERYTHING. Currently, I use 4 different planners to keep my life organized. If I fall off and stop using my planners, I get so mentally cluttered that I can’t even think straight. Then comes the stress, frustrations, and outbursts. Being able to write out, time block and read all of my tasks & schedules instead of trying to remember them leaves SO much clear space in my head. 

Don’t put pressure on yourself to stick to the list everyday, make adjustments throughout the day as they come. But stay consistent in making the list.

4. Meditating for your body.

The first few times I tried meditating, I couldn’t sit still and immediately stopped because I thought it wasn’t working. I started to think of meditating instead as a brain dump. Like journaling but in your head. I started letting all my thoughts come to the surface, acknowledging them, and then pushing them out. I like to meditate on days I don’t feel like journaling, this way I can still process my thoughts and clear my head. 

My body shows me in one of two ways that I need to meditate: clutter brain or brain rage.

Clutter brain: when my mind feels like it’s full of tasks but I can still see all the tasks laid out. This is when I know that I need to quietly meditate to organize my brain a bit & give myself space to think clearly.

Brain rage: when my mind is so full & confused that I can’t even think and start getting filled with rage & confusion. This is when I force myself to listen to a meditation guide to pull the focus out of my head & onto my body with the intention to ground myself. This usually comes after I’ve ignored my clutter brain warnings for too long.

Your mind & body are all connected. When you neglect one, the other starts to follow. You’re always on the go, never letting 5 minutes go by without taking care of a task or squeezing in another. Meditating for your body means that you’re forcing it to stay still and connect.

5. Self-affirmation & celebrating the small things.

As difficult as this may be for some (me), I still take 2 minutes at the end of my day to remind myself of all the things I accomplished throughout the day, instead of hyper-fixating on the things I didn’t get to. Part of taking care of your mental health is recognizing who you are doing it for.

Life is hard & prioritizing ourselves is too. Stop thinking that basic human necessities and self care are just tasks that are taking up space.

Prioritize yourself & recognize your efforts.

6. Eliminating what doesn’t fit your current phase of life.

Eliminating people/things from your life that don’t mentally benefit you is the first step to improving & maintaining your mental health. If it’s causing you mental or emotional stress, I promise you it won’t be missed. Once you get out of the endless loop, you’ll find everything you were looking for. 

Initially it seems like a huge unnecessary step that’s actually adding stress. But, focusing on so many relationships and responsibilities that no longer benefit you is probably what’s draining you. It’s not as deep as it seems. Some people/things aren’t meant to be in every phase of your life.

While you’re eliminating, remember to also build. Build the genuine relationships you have because just knowing that you have people in your corner that you can wholeheartedly trust to pick you up, makes all the difference. Do not isolate yourself.

7. Unplugging and resetting to maintain your mental health.

I have my days where I just want to scroll and avoid all of my responsibilities, but I really feel like I have so much more time in my days when I completely avoid my phone. I’m able to get more done, which makes me feel better, and I’m able to be more intentional/ present in whatever tasks I’m actually interested in doing. 

Also, resetting my space makes a huge difference on maintaining my mental health. Switch it up once in a while. Boredom doesn’t strike creativity.

8. Read a book/article or listen to a podcast.

Reading is more personal to me because it’s a hobby I’ve always had. I used to get overwhelmed because previously when I’d read my books, I’d spend HOURS reading, but I don’t have those hours to spend anymore. I started time blocking 30 minutes right before bed to read as much as I can and not get greedy with the time. Stopping myself after 30 minutes means I can still get enough sleep to take on the next day without being a zombie. 

When planning out your day & you see that you can’t fit reading into it or just aren’t interested in reading as a whole, set time aside to listen to a podcast. There’s a convenience to it that you can listen while you’re doing chores or even while you’re doing self care at the end of the day. Which brings me to my next point.

9. Self care is self care… not a luxury.

I say “self care” but what I really mean is basic human necessity. In order to maintain your mental health, prioritize your hygiene and preferred maintenance. The most basic self care makes me feel so much better about myself. Brushing my hair, skin care, nail maintenance, whatever.

It’s not a luxury, or at least it doesn’t have to be. If you want to save money/ time, teach yourself how to handle your personal care. Watch a video tutorial and practice. I do all of my maintenance at home because that’s what’s convenient for me & because I like that I know how to.

Stay consistent & intentional. Having a consistent routine takes some anticipation off and gives you something to look forward to.

10. Notice your signs & maintain them as they come.

This is probably the hardest to do but the most important part of the process. Learn to listen to what your body is telling you. You may be feeling sick, angry “without reason,” overly exhausted. These are some of the ways our bodies tells us when it’s time to stop and take care.

In order to hear what your body is telling you, you need to listen. Get outside & quiet your mind. Put as mush pressure on yourself to take a break as you do to complete a task. In order to maintain your mental health, you have to first take yourself out of overdrive.

These are just some of the things that I find help with my mental health but of course that doesn’t mean all of these will work for you. Make adjustments to your lifestyle and what you think you need most. 

The most important part: do what resonates with you & prioritize your mental health. No matter how many people are counting on you, you cannot help anyone without taking care of yourself too. 

I hope this helps momma!